Supporting a loved one with Alzheimer’s – strategies that work and pitfalls to avoid
This panel brings together Lucile Agarrat, psychologist at the Institut universitaire de gériatrie de Montréal, Sylvie Grenier, Executive Director of the Federation of Quebec Alzheimer Societies, Dr. Christine Grou, psychologist and President of the Ordre, and Natalie Choquette, singer and caregiver. This conference was recorded on June 15, 2023, in Montreal, as part of World Elder Abuse Awareness Day.
Photo credit: Louis-Étienne Doré.
Our videos are only in French.
Strategies to avoid and helpful alternatives
To avoid |
To embrace |
|---|---|
|
Reducing the person to their illness |
Treating the person as a whole individual and as a partner in their care and decision-making |
|
Trying to explain everything logically (correcting, rationalizing or bringing them back to reality) |
Welcoming your loved one’s emotions – validate their feelings and show empathy before providing information |
|
Reacting impatiently when they repeat things or are confused |
Remembering their reactions are not intentional – look for the need behind the behaviour, and stay creative and flexible |
|
Neglecting your own needs, carrying the burden alone and becoming exhausted |
Acknowledging your limits – seek support from professionals, family and friends |
|
Feeling guilty when you take time for yourself |
Taking breaks and treating self-care as essential to being able to support your loved one |
|
Not seeking a diagnosis out of fear of others’ judgement |
Encouraging early assessment because this opens the door to resources, better support and understanding |
Alzheimer's : a shared journey
Supporting someone with Alzheimer’s means learning to walk alongside them, not ahead of them. It requires patience, listening and often outside help. But it is also a relationship that can reveal unexpected moments of tenderness and gratitude. As the panelists point out, despite the obstacles and fatigue, there is also a precious reward: accompanying someone in their full humanity.
While this is a challenge full of grey areas, the panelists’ insights help us better understand what can weaken our relationship with our loved one and what can make it more genuine and compassionate.
Photo credit: Louis-Étienne Doré
Video capsules
(Our videos are only in French)